September 26

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Social media have consumed everyone in some way, shape, or form. It is the go-to for entertainment. TikTok blew up, and I find myself watching and laughing along with every video and following all the amazing travel and bucket-list experiences. I have been consumed with the how-to tips, and it is nonstop! I find myself “scrolling to scroll” aimlessly into the abyss. It can literally distract me for way too long, I admit it! The first step is admitting.

I am building a brand by blogging, writing, and, of course, posting on social media, where we shine and build. I wish social media existed when I was modeling and acting. I would have had a blast with it! I am still trying to figure out how to brand and market and use all the amazing tools available on social media. It is a full-time job.

Social media have also become a place where people feel safe to vent on all the hot topics behind their screens, and I have to admit this: at one time I fell into that as well. When I realized that I was perpetuating the one thing that I did not like about social media, I stopped. It is still energy, and I choose now to use it for positive vibes only.

I also admit that it is hard not to look at photos of exes or try to learn more about who they are dating. This is where I really had to shift. Back in October 2020, I went to a place for a week to work on past trauma, and on the first day, they took everyone’s phone away for the week. That first night, I found myself reaching for my phone. I did not have it or any device, and I was still reaching everywhere for it. I realized in that moment that I had become addicted to my phone, and worst, FOMO (fear of missing out)!

I was in the habit of scrolling to scroll. Ugh. By the third day of the week, that feeling had left me. When our phones were returned on the last day, something magical happened: I did not care about it as much. It became sort of bothersome to me. I lost the desire to look at anything. What I realized and became aware of is that nothing changed; everything was pretty much the same. The world went on without my likes or comments.

In November, I caught myself aimlessly scrolling for the wrong reasons, and I am not even sure what I was trying to find. I did realize that I was completely avoiding me. Then I made the decision to limit my posts and turn off my phone by seven in the evening. This was the best decision I have ever made. My sleep is better, my mornings are peaceful, and my attitude and writing improved 100 percent.

Since I made this decision, I have left my phone on and did the late-night scrolling maybe 5 to 10 percent of the time. The next day, when I was off my game, I quickly realized: “You were scrolling.”

If you looked at my social media, you’d see that I am active on it, promoting my blog, website, and upcoming book release. But for my mental clarity, if I feel like getting online, I instead join a class, meditate, or listen to a book on Audible.

The book I am reading now, which goes hand in hand with this subject, is The War of Art by Steven Pressfield. This book is written for creatives and how we resist. The light bulbs were going off for me because it took me back to October, when my phone was taken from me for a week and how it had become an obsessive attachment in my life.

Do me a favor: check your phone to see how much screen time you are truthfully using. Are you scrolling to scroll? Are you looking up the past? If you are, stop. Set a schedule on your phone.

I turn my phone off at seven in the evening and turn it on at seven in the morning. I have not missed anything by doing this. I look at social media when I am taking a break from my life, and I limit it to a quick catch-up on my media. Reality is not on social media! Reality is in reading books, traveling, shooting with a camera, taking deep breaths, enjoying moments, and most importantly, spending time with friends and family.

Don’t let scrolling be your reality. You will be distracted by nonsense, and worst of all, off your purpose. And according to my chiropractor, that is the business to be in! Because of the position of looking at our phones all the time while we aimlessly scroll, we do our neck and upper back damage! My chiropractor sees more and more younger people than ever before because of this. Something to think about.

Debsxo


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About the author

From her start as a Playboy Centerfold and Covergirl to her life as a Screen Actors’ Guild member and later, achieving the Top 5% in her industry as a member of the Million Dollar Roundtable, Deborah Driggs has had to clear many hurdles in life. While it may seem like Deborah’s success came easy to her, nothing could be further from the truth. Rather, she has had to overcome a number of challenges in life to get to where she is today. What is true - and a part of her character - is her willingness to take risks, maintain a positive attitude, and never take ‘No’ for an answer.